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How I Just Got Arrested

In retrospect, it's kinda funny. But the more I think about it, the angrier I get. The fact that this is going to be the first entry of the new Superbusnet.com is also pretty sad.

I left work (a bit early, admittedly) to meet up with Mike at Bungay School; the goal was to get in some hitting and fielding practice. This in itself was, for the most part, uneventful, save that the field was like playing in wet dog shit due to the week's rain. We got done, and hung out for a bit, shooting the shit. At that point, Mike brought out the discus he found at O'Brien; sure enough, it was actually one of their old discuses, female sized, but a discus nonetheless. Mike didn't throw discus - he was a runner - but I did, so this was a great thing (and really, something he did almost specifically for me). I decided to get one throw in. This was a mistake; it was dark, and Bungay's field isn't lit. I think the discus caught on end and rolled away, because I couldn't find it to save my life; it wasn't a good throw, as can be expected from someone that hasn't thrown in ten years.

This is where things get interesting. I went to find the discus, but couldn't, so I had Mike put on his high beams; he was facing the field. He did, but I still could not find it. So I went and put MY beams on; still nothing.

This is where I got stupid: I figured I'd take my car onto the field, search for the discus, and get out of there. I figured someone would complain, and I didn't want to deal with the cops, so I figured I'd take a really slow lap - maybe two - and if I didn't find it, get off the field.

I didn't even get the chance. Three minutes passed, maybe, before two cop cars - followed by a third - came about with their searchlight running. This wasn't just a passer-by; they got the call, and were there in three minutes, in tandem. Four cops and a K-9 overall. I immediately got out of the car with my hands up; I didn't want to get plugged by someone with a happy trigger finger.

This is where it gets really stupid; I figured they'd talk to me, ask me what the fuck I was doing, but that was it. Next thing I knew, they had me away from the car, on my stomach, and cuffed! What the fuck!? I could see them reacting because hey, Seymour's a dead town, and there's really nothing to do, so kids often get stupid with their off-road vehicles. They didn't say shit; down I went, on went the cuffs, I was frisked for weapons, and after about five minutes of Pig Theatre, I was asked who I was, where I lived, and FINALLY, what the fuck I was doing. I told him the truth; I threw a discus, and didn't want to lose it, so I went looking for it, hoping to use my beams. They went and talked to Mike (probably thinking I was taking the piss), and he collaborated my story; he also not only confirmed that I was not only not drunk, but also a teetotaller, which they were surprised about.

After awhile, they got me off the ground, but still had me cuffed. They went and searched for the discus, and eventually found it (they wouldn't even let me look at the fucking thing; "You don't have to turn around"). I would think that after seeing someone with no police incidents since 2002, that being my only one, and that being a full acquittal, they'd show me at least a little bit of respect, especially as I was basically saying that yes, this was a dumb move, and yes, I could have thought this out more. FINALLY - after about a half hour - they took the cuffs off of me, and let me get my car off the grass, after noting that no, no fucking damage was done.

At this point, they made me stay in the car - what, I hadn't proven that I wasn't a threat YET? - and came to me, saying that well, there wasn't a statute for someone driving onto grass to find a discus, but they got me for simple trespassing, which was a "break"; a $92 break. After this, Mike and I decided to go get something to eat at the Valley Diner - because hey, after getting arrested and belittled by the Seymour PD, what better way to cap off a night of being white Valley trash? - and I was going to take his car; why take two, I figured. They made me get my car - "Take your car and get out of here" - which was... really, fine with me at this point.

In the beginning, Mike and I were laughing about it. I made a bit of a sarcastic post about it on Twitter (which went to Facebook automatically), and Mike was virtually liveblogging the experience. We laughed about it at the diner, as well. But the more I think about this, the angrier I get. Four cops and a dog for one guy who's doing 2MPH on a softball field? Really? Furthermore, I have to deal with the indignity of being cuffed and laying on the ground like a common criminal, something for everyone passing by or just in the area to rubberneck, take pictures of, etc.? Yes, what I did was very ill-advised... fuck, we'll just say it was a stupid choice. But this wasn't protecting; this was theatre, in a town where next to nothing of note happens, and most of the crime is either done by the idiots living on New Street, or by bored teenagers.

This isn't my first dealing with the Seymour PD, either. A couple years ago, when I was still living on Argonne Terrace - and therefore officially living in Seymour - our downstairs neighbour had a pizza in the oven. Of course, he was drunk - as always - so he passed out on the couch; meanwhile, he almost burned the house down. I thought someone was cooking something at first, but my door was closed; next thing I knew, I had people banging on my door. I opened my door to answer, and immediately saw and smelled excessive smoke; I knew something was wrong. I woke Mom up and went downstairs, where I saw the idiot passed out on his couch. Long story short, I woke up the room-mate before I had to break down the door, and I got the drunk out of there, barely avoiding a fistfight in the process. Eventually, the FD and a cop went there and checked it out, and I was talking to someone about how I probably would have beaten the drunk's ass had he really swung at me. Here comes the cop, Capt. Buford T. Fuckin' Justice, going "Yeah! And if you'd have done it, you'd have had to deal with me! You don't want to deal with me!". Long, long story short, I ended up calling him "bacon bits" after he kept trying to impress me with his being a cop (and my complete inability to comprehend how this idiot was forgetting that OUR DOWNSTAIRS NEIGHBOUR ALMOST BURNED DOWN A NINE FAMILY HOUSE BECAUSE HE WAS TOO DRUNK FOR FROZEN PIZZA), and had to be restrained by a few other neighbours.

The endpoint of this is that the Seymour Police Department needs some fucking hobbies, or something better to do; even if I was a dumb teenager on an off-roader, the cuff and search treatment would have been too much. I laughed about it at the time, but I have to wonder if that was out of self-preservation; afterall, the first - and only, to this point - time I was arrested, it was for Assault in 2002, and that had to happen; some drunk spit in my face in a pizzeria, and I beat the everliving shit out of him - I didn't even have to go through this, and I was just as accommodating to the police as I was today (really, I put up ZERO resistance). I was eventually acquitted for that, though I have to wonder how much of that had to do with the fact that I was in the military. In this, I got a $92 fine for Simple Trespassing - fuck, I'm not sure if this counts as an official "arrest" - and unlike before, where I was feeling fortunate to get out of there without having to be bailed out by Mike, I'm going to fight this, as it seems like they stood around going "well, fuck, we can't just leave him with a verbal warning, we have to think of SOMETHING for all this trouble..."

Either Seymour needs fewer cops, or something legitimate to do. Because the way they treated me - no matter who I was, or what I was doing - was completely overkill, and mortifying.




Not all is lost, however. There is one good thing to come out of this.



I got my fuckin' discus back.

Comments

( 8 comments — Leave a comment )
dmajohnson
May. 30th, 2009 05:43 am (UTC)
DOO DOO DOO DOO!

You found the Discus. On the item subscreen, you can set it to a C button. Press C to use it and attack distant enemies!

*shot*
sam767
May. 30th, 2009 08:42 am (UTC)
;__; Glad they didn't try to arrest you at least. Wish they didn't fine you though.

That sounds like something that would happen where I live. It's among the safest cities in the country. So what do the cops do? Fuck people up for traffic tickets. A normal cop car AND an SUV for some random bint?

Have a good night.
burning_phoneix
May. 30th, 2009 11:37 am (UTC)
You know, this made me think our lazy do nothing cops are not so bad by comparison.
shotglass
May. 30th, 2009 12:24 pm (UTC)
Damn, and I thought the cops here were irritating. Obviously not so bad as bored small-town cops. I'm glad nothing too bad came of it, even if the fine really makes it look like they're starved for money.

That's quite a heroic pose there. Nice discus, man.
vyctori
May. 30th, 2009 12:35 pm (UTC)
Holy shit, 'Bus. That's nuts. Good luck fighting the fine.
mel_makoro
May. 30th, 2009 01:42 pm (UTC)
Ouch, man. That sucks about what happened there. :(

Yay for discus?
popo_licious
May. 30th, 2009 10:58 pm (UTC)
Oh, phew. XD I thought it was something awful, like, "I spent all night in the slammer!" awful. XD Too bad about the fine though. Hopefully you'll be able to explain yourself to a higher power and get them to dismiss it. Glad you're okay! XD
samuraiter
May. 31st, 2009 01:30 am (UTC)
I feel your pain on this one, though they haven't fined me (yet, damn them; it's bad enough getting followed or stopped by them just for walking around). Police in general are shit, it seems, especially in do-nothing suburbs like the ones you and I inhabit. Condolences on the $92.

And I didn't know this was what a certain other poster meant when he mentioned getting a flashlight for somebody. ^_^; Now my comments over there look stupid. (Deleted / reposted for errors.)
( 8 comments — Leave a comment )

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